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look. i am not abusive to my kid. not even close. and neither is her father.

she is a happy, healthy three year old. she speaks three languages, loves to dance middle eastern style, and explains to strangers that ‘mama is from america’ but she is from bumblebee (the name of her preschool).

but, us american society, history, government is abusive to black children.

and egyptian society and government is abusive to black children. i know this cause i worked with sub saharan african refugees in cairo. i worked with ex child soldiers and teenage sex workers from sudan, refugees from eritrea and ethiopia. they are stuck here in limbo, cairo, legally segregated from the rest of egyptian society, not allowed to attend public schools, hospitals, racially profiled by the police, making 150 dollars a month is a considered a good job, living in ghettos, and struggling to either be repatriated or moved to europe, the usa, or australia.

they have been my teachers, my students, my friends.

some of them are mothers, and many of them didn’t have a real choice in the matter.

a lot of them look like me.

a lot of them don’t have the luxury of child free spaces, because many of them are children, themselves.

i know what abuse is. i grew up with it, day after day, year after year. and there are times when i would rather have my daughter with me at a bar, than with a babysitter that i barely know.

i work really hard so that my daughter knows that she is a person. because it is rare for black girls or women to be allowed to be people, a full fledged person, in this world.

so, when i was in the west bank back in the summer of 2006, israel was bombing lebanon, and i realized i might be pregnant. my partner was in the states at the time, so i had to rely on a couple of friends to help me procure a home pregnancy test in israel since we couldnt find one in the west bank. as we were sitting in the park in jerusalem at night, eating cake, and hiding from the guards, one of my friends explained that she would most likely not be able to have kids. i nodded my head. and then she went on a small rant about how immoral it was to have kids, and be a breeder.
whoa. that word, breeder, was like a smack in the face. i wont go deep into the racial implications of that word, but as bfp pointed out earlier this week, black women in the states have historically been forced to be pregnant and to produce offspring, but not to be a mother. being able to not choose to bear a child can be a privilege. and so can being allowed to be a mother.
later that night when i was finally home, i saw the two pink lines appear on the plastic wand. and my suspicions were confirmed, i was ‘with child’.

i was pro choice before i became pregnant, but it was being pregnant for ten months that made me proclaim, loudly, to anyone who would listen: i am so pro-abortion because no one, and i mean no one, should have to be pregnant if they dont want to! anyone who thinks that adoption is an alternative to an abortion is nuts, it totally ignores that you have to be fucking pregnant for a fucking year first.

i know that giving birth, and/or being a mother is not always a choice. in a lot of the world a safe abortion is not necessarily available. here in egypt, is in a lot of the world, abortion is outlawed. and even in countries where abortion is legal, it can be out of the price range for the majority of women. in a lot of countries, an abortion is not feasible for a woman because of the red tape that she needs to go through. or the distance that the nearest clinic is. or if her family or partner discover that she has had an abortion she will be turned out of her house with no resources, no money, no job, no safety net, nothing. or she will be beaten. or the only type of abortion available are so dangerous to the woman’s health that she risks her very life in having one.

in the eastern congo, rape is used as a primary weapon of war. and women are kidnapped and raped for months until they become pregnant, then they are set free in the mountainous jungle. abortion is illegal in this country. and i talked with methodist christian ladies who were working day and night to be able to provide the morning after pill for every woman they can in their region. the work they do is but a drop in the bucket. they never have enough supplies.

maybe its because i grew up around girls in the states who didnt have a choice to become a mother. they had sex. they got pregnant by accident. and then they were stuck, threatened, beatened with no resources to be able to get to a clinic, that i dont assume that a woman chose to give birth; simply because she cares for her child. nor do i know what kind of internal choices she has made to be able to love a child.

i do know that it took everything inside of me to not start crying and never stop when i sat in rooms full of congolese rape survivors nursing their children. i know that they told me that their children were a gift, and i believed them.

this is why i work hard to do what i do. why i created the lilith plan. provide alternatives to clinical abortions that are not always available and can be traumatizing even if available. i research plants, herbs, flowers for their abortifacient qualities. i study acupressure texts. i build del-ems. i make the information available through any means i can find. cause a lot of women, women that we see everyday with their children never had the choice whether or not to become pregnant or be a mother. they walk by us, not screaming their life stories at us. and we judge them, not even with the little facts about them that we have, but with the stories and narratives that we make up about them in our heads.

i saw the lilith plan in a vision one night as i was meditating. and am slowly working to make it a reality.

This week the African Union Summit opens in Kampala, Uganda. The Maputo Plan of Action, one of the most progressive international sexual and reproductive rights and health frameworks authored to date, and put in place by African leaders in 2006, is up for renewal.  The plan, penned in Maputo, Mozambique four years ago, expires in [...]

The Sexual and Reproductive Health and Rights (SRHR) Situation Report is a monthly column highlighting policies and issues around the world.  This month, I’m taking a closer look at maternal death in Kenya. Because of it’s relative stability, Kenya is a popular travel and study abroad destination, and has loads of international players working there– [...]

Found via Think Progress, a video of an Associated Press reporter diving in oiled Gulf waters and living to tell the tale.

I think that there are some really interesting things going on with this video, and they spark a lot of thoughts for me. I can’t help but think about the power of broadcast media here. The media is bringing us these horrific and grim images of oiled birds, satellite photos showing the oil spill from space, and now, these visions of an underwater nightmare with water so clotted with oil that it’s hard to find the surface. The media has also brought us so many iconic images that have spurred people into action or infuriation, not just in the case of the Deepwater Horizon disaster, but in countless instances.

Photo and video reporting has ended wars and sparked riots and everything in between.

That iconic image by Kevin Carter of a starving Sudanese toddler being stalked by a vulture. Coffins from Iraq and Afghanistan. Photos from Little Rock, the Twin Towers, Vietnam, Hiroshima. Neda Agha-Soltan. Images have tremendous power and the widespread availability of really compelling, stark, and sometimes terrifying imagery has made many things that were once abstract seem more immediate. There’s also a problematic history when it comes to the way that places outside the United States are framed for viewers and readers here, what kinds of images we are shown; The Sudan is starving children and lions, India is saris and The Ganges, Brazil is bikinis and favelas.

Images motivate people to do things. They fire up deep rage, horror, compassion. If we were not looking at photos and videos of the spill in the Gulf of Mexico, it would seem more remote and distant, less like something that is actually happening. Instead we are confronted with them everywhere we turn.

Continue reading at Feministe …

Soccer is the only sport that I watch with any regularity, so I am very excited about the FIFA World Cup games that will be taking place in South Africa from June 11 - July 11 2010.

However, I was disappointed when I heard about groups expressing concern about not being able to distribute condoms during the upcoming games.

South Africa has the world's largest number of HIV carriers, with an estimated 5.7 million people infected – about one in every five adults. There are around 1,400 new HIV infections every day and nearly 1,000 AIDS deaths.

FIFA has strict regulations that only allow official sponsors into venues, which means that fans will not be able to gain access to condoms or health information that non-sponsors are looking to provide. This is a huge problem, because the World Cup is a huge opportunity to distribute important information and condoms to a large audience in a country with such a high number of people impacted by HIV and AIDS.

If you want to voice your opinion about this situation, contact FIFA.

h/t to CaitieCat at Shakesville.

Homophobia is incredibly rampant throughout the continent of Africa. As evidenced by the ‘Kill the gays’ bill in Uganda, the lives of LGBT citizens are incredibly precarious around the world. A similar case of legal persecution has surfaced in Malawi, where a Judge has convicted a gay couple of indecency for conducting a public ceremony celebrating their engagement to one another. That’s right folks; two men face years of prison time for publicly expressing their love to one another. Tiwonge Chimbalanga and Steven Monjeza, both in their twenties, were arrested a day after they celebrated their engagement with a party.

Undule Mwakasungula, a gay rights activist in Malawi, said the couple’s decision to declare their relationship with an engagement ceremony appears to have been personal, not political. Others have been prosecuted under the law but this case was different because the two men were open about their homosexuality, Mwakasungula said.

The couple were convicted of unnatural acts and gross indecency under laws dating from the colonial era. Blantyre Chief Resident Magistrate Nyakwawa Usiwa said the sentencing will take place on Thursday and they could be imprisoned for up to 14 years.

The verdict is “extremely disturbing,” said Michaela Clayton of the Namibia-based AIDS & Rights Alliance for Southern Africa, saying it could encourage anti-gay sentiment in the region as well as set back the fight against AIDS.

Clayton is absolutely correct here. The possible consequences of this kind of legal persecution are devastating for more than just LGBT citizens; it also impacts the health of the entire continent. Nearly twelve percent of the population in Malawi lives with HIV/AIDS. That’s nearly a million people. The more gay people are forced underground in Africa, the less likely it will be that they seek counseling and treatment for AIDS. Furthermore, legal discrimination of LGBT citizens trickles down into socio-cultural marginalization and violence.

Homosexuality is illegal in at least 37 countries in Africa including Malawi. In Uganda, lawmakers are considering a bill that could sentence homosexuals to life in prison and includes capital punishment for “repeat offenders.” Even in South Africa, the only African country that recognizes gay rights, gangs have raped lesbians.

Mwakasungula said the two Malawian men were concerned that if they were released, they could be attacked by Malawians who have threatened them. But given the laws and the climate in Malawi, he said a guilty verdict had been expected.

It’s also important to recognize that this is not an isolated form of discrimination by the state. In fact, Malawi Church leaders are playing a major role in shaping the social, political, and cultural fear of homosexuality throughout the region.

The one bit of good news is that the Malawi couple, according to the South African Litigation Centre, can appeal the conviction on the ground that it violates the countries 1994 constitution. Unfortunately for Tiwonge and Steven, their lawyers previous attempt to have the case thrown out on these exact grounds was rejected.

The official sentencing will take place on Thursday.

“She was disobedient at a time when disobedience was not tolerated.” - Taking Root film “Taking Root brings to life the confidence and joy of people working to improve their own lives while also ensuring the future and vitality of their land.” – Taking Root website synopsis Last month, our nation’s capital hosted the 18th annual [...]

This guest post is a part of the Feministe series on Sexual Assault Awareness Month.

I think a TRIGGER WARNING is appropriate here.

Why does the institution of marriage exist? Even highly romanticized commercials for De Beers speak to the primary historic nature of the marriage contract: material well-being, as well as securing that well-being for the future generation. This isn’t to say that people who wound up, and continue to wind up, married to each other have no emotional investment in the enterprise. But even the many symbolic acts that occur across cultures when people tie the knot also tend to have practical roots, no?

In light of all that, it almost weirds me out when anyone professes to be shocked by the phenomenon of child marriage. “Really,” I want to say. “Have you taken a look at the world you live in as of late?”

In Yemen, a study by Sanaa University found that something like half the women are married off before they are 18. Last year, a 12-year-old Yemeni girl, Fawziya Ammodi, and her baby died after three days of painful labour – it was a highly publicized case, but how many such cases never even get on anyone’s radar?

Still, Yemeni society, already in a precarious position for many socio-economic reasons, is held together by seriously entrenched tribal customs, and it won’t let go of those customs without a fight. Plenty of parents think that they are setting their little girl up with a better future when they marry her off. This is why you can’t address the issue of child marriage without addressing poverty. Giving parents an actual financial incentive to not marry off their little kid is the challenge – as opposed to any sort of initial ideological conversion.

Armed conflict plays its part as well. Living in the Middle East, I heard plenty of young Palestinian girls married off to older Saudi men, for example. In fact, a Saudi friend of mine was once accosted by an older Palestinian woman who mistakenly believed him to be on the prowl – “What you do with our girls is shameful!” she screamed.

You can’t address child marriage without addressing sex either. What is one of the biggest arguments for child marriage? The idea that it cuts down on wanton sluttitude, of course. One of the things that more traditional cultures inevitably get right is the whole notion that hey, children are sexual beings to one extent or another. What they tend to do with that notion is another matter entirely, of course. Girls in particular are seen as both as “threat” and a kind of product that can’t stay on the shelf for too long, lest it get spoiled. How do you begin to deal with that? I believe that making this an issue of health is a good start. Sure, giving birth when you’re 12 used to be the norm across the board once upon a time – and it was also during that time that people didn’t live for very long, now, did they?

I believe that one of the really unhelpful ways in which we, as outsiders, treat child marriage is in the hand-wringing. Let’s say you meet a woman from an African nation and, in the course of getting to know her, find out that the first time she was actually married was, like, 12. Going “OH MY GOD! THAT MUST HAVE BEEN HORRIBLE! OH MY GOD! SOMEBODY GET THE SMELLING SALTS!” is completely uncalled-for. It can often be pretty demeaning, actually.

The one time I really got a chance to have a candid conversation with a woman who had that background, the way she related to what happened struck me. She was honest about the fact that getting married made her feel mature. She was honest about the brutality of her first sexual encounter with her husband at age 14 (she didn’t use the word “rape,” so I won’t put words in her mouth – although I believe that rape is exactly what happens in this type of situation, I can’t find another word to define it). She was honest about how glad she was that she didn’t get pregnant during her first marriage. She also fully believed that her parents wanted nothing but the best for her. She was honest about the fact that when her first husband died, she mourned him. Would she want the same for her daughters? No. But by the time we spoke, she was living in an altogether different life.

Shocking? To someone like me, yes. But I remember – Shakespeare’s Juliet was 13. We rightfully label Humbert Humbert as a monster, but we can’t deny the fact that “Lolita” has entered the vernacular not as the rape victim that Nabokov described, but as an underage sex kitten. “If she’s old enough to bleed, she’s old enough to breed” is not just a sexist joke employed to get a rise out of you, it has its basis in a certain culture and a certain worldview. It goes back to the idea of what a partnership between a man and a woman (the act of marriage is supposed to make a “woman” out of a girl, of course) means to us. And it goes back to the nature of how millions of people on this planet live their lives – how harsh the experience can be, and how utilitarian in many of its goals, with a girl’s body as a handy tool. If the tool breaks, so what? There’s plenty more where it came from.

In that sense, the fight that’s going on over child marriage in Yemen is only the tip of the iceberg.

I wanted to point you in the direction of this article from the Associated Press:

It took a street protest, government intervention and a Constitutional Court ruling over the past weeks to get women appointed to Egypt’s State Council court for the first time. The final result was a victory, but many women’s rights advocates are dismayed that after decades of struggle it took such a fight, and that such views still run so deep, even among the country’s elite.

Especially given that women have already been judges for years on most Egyptian courts.

This is easily my favourite part:

“They say their decision to ban women from the bench is out of compassion for us, they want to spare women the tiring, difficult work,” columnist Amal Abdel-Hadi wrote in the independent daily, al-Masry al-Youm. “These judges have obviously not worked as a public school teacher, a nurse or a midwife.”

There’s also some history around recent issues in women’s rights in the Egyptian legal system as well as an interview with Tahany el-Gebali, who became the first woman judge in 2003. Go give it a read.