Here's what I have been filling my senses with lately:
Eating:
the kids and I are cooking our way around the world with the Kids' Around the World Cookbook. It is amazing what they will eat when they have a hand in making it.
Reading:
I am reading The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. LeGuin, the Sexual Life of Catherine M. by Catherine Millet, and The Gift of Fear by Gavin DeBecker. The kids and I are reading the second book in the Pendragon series, and Leaves of Grass.
Listening:
I am listening to a ton of stuff, but I am allowing myself to be heavily influenced by the musical tastes of the sole musician in Black Wax Machine. So lots of guitar stuff. Ethereal. Instrumental. Quavering and wavering. And Jimi Hendrix! Wow.
Watching:
I am working my way through all of the episodes of Futurama. Last week I watched the Boondocks Saints (I think is what it is called). I saw the Bjork movie the other night in the theater. Puffy Chair movie. I am sure there are things I can say about all of these, but I can't think of anything off of the top of my head.
Doing:
Mostly just a lot of sitting around thinking about cleaning up the place. Getting by. It has been a very lazy in practical things, active in my heartfelt pursuits kind of last few weeks. The kids and I play cards and go swimming a lot. I take my walks. Get embroiled in things. Have endless conversations in chat. My house is breaking. I am planning a maybe trip to chicago in the fall. Maybe. And I am dreaming of buying a mandolin, and a tattoo.
Thinking:
I am thinking about relationships and their parameters and rules. What I can accept and what I must reject - either by virtue of my own preferences or by virtue of my motherhood and the limits it places on my freedom. I hate to say it like that, but there is a certain amount of caution I must exercise when it comes to tripping around after love. It is, of course, up to me to define those limits. And I am thinking a lot about that. Also, the book. I am thinking about finding someone to help me select what goes in and what does not. And to help me with some decisions about future publishing ventures. I might just make the book more of an annual zine kind of thing. We will see.
Feeling:
Absolute and total bliss. Terror, to some extent. hahaha. Love - Deep and abiding and difficult to place or define. Panic about random little stupid things in my life. Contentment. A desire for order balanced with a seeming need to create disorder. Sexiness. A kind of restless laziness. Sure-footedness. Love.
that about describes where I'm at right now.