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Posts tagged Various and Sundry

The best spam comment ever

Hello, people! I apologize for my inattention to the Smoking Lounge; we (by which I mean the secret feminist cabal that rules the world) are getting ready to launch our new thingy. Hopefully tomorrow. Yeah, I know it was gonna be a few weeks ago, but talk to the hand.

In the meantime, I thought I’d share the latest pearl from my spam filter. I don’t usually save spam comments, but this one is wonderful:

Advantageously, the article is really the sweetest on this precious subject. I harmonize along with your conclusions and will eagerly watch for ones own incoming updates. Saying thank you will not just be ample, for your great clarity in your writing. I will without delay snap up your rss to keep privy of every updates. Authentic work and much success in your business enterprise!

My first thought was that it was a machine translation, but it’s almost too perfectly machine-like, if you know what I mean. It’s almost like a human being trying to sound like a machine — a reverse Turing, if you will.

Thoughts?

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Olympics final weekend: open thread

Virtue and Moir take the gold medal in ice dancing.

Virtue and Moir take the gold medal in ice dancing.

I’m here, I’m at my computer, but I’m extremely busy. So no post; just this lousy open thread.

The figure skating has been absolutely glorious this year. Kim Yu-Na is God. Virtue and Moir are the King and Queen of the Universe. Johnny Weir is the Grand Duke of Cool.

Live blog with Pat LaMarche right now!!!

Go: Corrente is doing a live blog with Pat LaMarche, Green candidate for VP in 2004.

(Sorry, I just woke up.)

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And now, the devil people of Quebec

Who knew Quebec was populated by tattooed fiddle-playing biker gangs?

Weirdest damn Olympic ceremony shtick I’ve ever seen.

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UPDATE: Couple of things.

First: interesting choice for an Olympic song. I mean, yes, Leonard Cohen is a great songwriter. “Hallelujah” is a great song. And god knows, k.d. lang sang the shit out of it. But still, I’m going…what? Really? For the Olympics?

Also: the Olympic Hymn should not be sung by opera singers. Actually, the Olympic Hymn should probably not be sung, period.

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Comment of the day

Not mine; Carmonn’s. Sisterkenney treated us all to a really spectacular display of her latent hatred for other women, and Carmonn responded with this:

Her grasp of domestic or foreign policy? Her understanding of economics? Her deep identification with women of color? Her empathy with people who are suffering under the yoke of the new Depression II? Naah. She’s a female. All she needs.

Have you ever heard of Barack Obama or George W. Bush? It appears that you haven’t, so let me fill you in. They’re frighteningly unintelligent, craven, useless, unempathetic men. Who happen to be Presidents of the United States. It’s been established that the President doesn’t need to have any grasp of policy, deep identification with anyone, or empathy in any form. All he needs is to be male, which makes your statement that being female is “all she needs” slightly puzzling. All she needs to be savaged and held to gross double standards, perhaps? If Palin were male, all of this would be moot. She’s probably the second most charismatic politician to come along in the past 50 years, and we’d also have to pretend that Samuel Palin was “brilliant,” the way we have to pretend with Obama. We’re not allowed to call stupid men stupid, we’re allowed to call them the political leaders of the United States.

I care because writing answers TO QUESTIONS YOU KNOW AHEAD OF TIME on your hand smacks of the low-rent, high-school level of discourse and education that she has.

I never knew frat boys had such gravitas, but I suppose her low-rent, high school level of discourse will be profoundly abashed by our “wee-wee’d up,” “dirt off the shoulder,” “retards,” political culture. I’ve got 99 Problems and I’m still trying to figure out if she might be one, but dear god I hope she doesn’t drag our discourse down too far.

and is hot to some,-watch out, that might bite ya

Interesting observation, that. Of course, those beefcake shots of shirtless Barack running didn’t seem to have a downside.

It’s a measure of what a total mindfuck patriarchy is that someone who actually reads feminist blogs (and I’m referring now to the hapless sisterkenney) can be so confused. She mistakes sexist double standards for fairness, and thinks that Sarah Palin is a grasping uppity bitch for complaining.

I think a lot of unfeminist women (and that sadly includes some women who think they’re feminists) are operating on a scarcity model. It’s the Russian peasant mentality: goddamn if anybody is gonna get more than me. (Or, as a Lithuanian writer once said: “Every Lithuanian secretly hopes his neighbor’s horse dies.”) It just enrages them for some woman they don’t like to buck the patriarchy.

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It will never stop snowing

Just thought I’d say that.

Meanwhile, the White House press secretary is writing things on his hand and President Obama is holding campfire sing-alongs with Republicans. Leadership!

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Snowed in, clumping mascara edition

Tree.  By Maybelline.

Tree. By Maybelline.

Look at those branches. I think that’s the effect you’re supposed to get from using powder + mascara. Thickens the lashes.

I sure hope my internet doesn’t go out.

The back porch of the Smoking Lounge.

The back porch of the Smoking Lounge, mid-snowstorm.

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Snowed in!

The deck of the Smoking Lounge

The deck of the Smoking Lounge

Several inches of snow arrived at the Smoking Lounge today, as you can see from the above photo. By the way, this is a rare opportunity for you all to see Raoul in his ectoplasm form, albeit covered in snow. See those two snow drift shapes in the chairs? That’s actually Raoul and Nietzsche in spirit form, coated with a light dusting of precipitation.

Meanwhile, I’m still head down with the website I’m putting together. I did note with great hilarity that the President used his State of the Union address to reach out to Republicans. Remember what I said about Che Guevara? Yeah.

I think it’s definitely time for a serious confab on third-party politics. As soon as I get past this website thingy I’m doing I’ll be able to re-focus my white-hot laser-like beam of attention on the situation. There’s the Justice Party, and Mr. Jeff Roby has a very interesting approach he’s calling Full Court Press. I definitely like the tactical idea of running a challenger in every single district — that’ll get their attention.

So, what else is going on out there?

Best post title on the State of the Union address

It’s from Bruce Dixon over at Black Agenda Report:

Obama State of the Union: Guns For the Pentagon, Butter For Wall Street, A Spending Freeze For You

Beautiful, innit? Kind of sums it all up. (But go read the whole post, too.)

Is anybody planning to watch the speech? I would, but I’m too busy with this website thingy I’m trying to get launched. Somebody told me on the phone that Sarah Palin is attacking NOW for their stance on unborn football players, but I don’t even have time to go look it up.

Open thread.

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Men’s Rights Activists on Haitian relief: men need maxi-pads too!

Tracy Clark-Flory has a good piece in Broadsheet about the special needs of women in disaster zones. Men’s Rights Activists are outraged:

Therefore, according to Clark-Flory, “women in general will be in need of ‘hygiene supplies’ …” Men and boys apparently will not need those things.

MRAs are a blight on the earth, but there’s one good thing about them: they are all unfuckingbelievably stupid.

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Via Alternet via a comment at I Blame The Patriarchy.